People often come up and ask me, “Dion, do you like your job?” It’s one of those questions that never ceases to surprise me given the fact that I’ve spent the last 20 years of my life doing what I do. But at the same time, it’s a question that always stumps me.
I do know that most times when people do ask me this question it is out of genuine interest and perhaps perplexity. I suspect what people are honestly wondering is whether or not the work I do brings me joy and fulfillment in life, or if I do this work out of a sense of obligation and as a result, resent every day that I go back to face the task at hand.
The fact is, it is impossible for me to answer this question properly in the short amount of time I usually have in the social setting I find myself in. When mingling in a crowd and making small talk, the only real response anyone has time to hear when they ask me this question is generally ‘yes’, ‘no’, or ‘maybe’. But in reality, my honest answer to this question is ‘all of the above’.
YES I absolutely do love my job. It brings me great joy and a deep sense of satisfaction to be able to journey alongside folks who live on the streets. 20 years ago when I moved to Toronto from a small town in Newfoundland to pursue a dream of becoming a rock star (which didn’t pan out for me…) I got my first job as the cook in an old drop-in center called The Salvation Army Friendship Room. I came as a small town, conservative, evangelical 20-year old boy to save people. But I quickly learned that it was me that was being saved. And that’s still my story today. The truth is, I feel overwhelmingly blessed to have made so many beautiful friends amongst my staff, our volunteers, my friends on the streets, and the generous folks who are so willing to open their wallets to support our work. I have learned so much about life, community, hope, faith, love, peace, gratitude, God, and so much more as a result of the gift of this work.
NO I do not like this job. In fact, I totally hate it. There is so much pain and destruction all around me. The stories I hear every day of abuse, rape, violence and neglect often overwhelm me to the point of depression. The problems we have all around us today are quite frankly so much worse than they were 20 years ago when I began this work and I sometimes wonder why bother keep trying. There are far more people who are homeless today than there were then. There are deeper and more profound issues with addiction, prostitution, family violence, unemployment, guns and gangs, corrupt systems, and the list goes on. The gap between the rich and the poor continues to increase. There is not enough decent, affordable housing for people to live in. There are not enough addiction treatment beds for all of the people seeking help to kick their addictions. Our cultures obsession with obtaining material things continues to come at a cost of more and more casualties of people being left behind. And I know that homelessness and poverty is not a money problem. There is definitely enough to go around. These issues are a will problem. I definitely do not like this job and I wish there were justice and equality for all people so I didn’t have to keep doing what I do for a living.
MAYBE I kind of do like this job. The joy and pain of the work continues to throw me off balance. I love it and hate it all at the same time. I love that I am a healthier person as a result of being privileged enough to have become friends with so many people who have been left behind by our culture. Yet I am saddened that the people who have taught me so much have themselves had to go through more pain than I can even comprehend. As I walk through this desert land in the wastelands of society, I am almost always thirsty. Sometimes I see water and run towards it only to find that what I was seeing was just a mirage that gave me false hope. But other times when I think I’m finally going to die of thirst, I stumble upon an oasis that quenches my longing and rejuvenates my energy so that I can keep walking on. Maybe, just maybe, I like this job enough to keep walking ahead.
So on this first day of the school season as we embark on getting back into a post-summer routine, I ask that you journey with me towards justice. We can do more together than we can do on our own. I continue to hope for justice and equality for all people, and I am thankful to know that I am very much not alone in this quest.
Shalom
Dion